A woman who was a sister to me died on Monday.  Her death was not unexpected but despite this it was still a shock. This is not unusual. Having experienced the death of loved ones before, now matter how well prepared one is, death is never a comfortable experience.

Like all family, my sister and I had our disagreements but as luck would have it we were able to have a comfortable coze and admit missing each other when I came over for her daughter’s wedding. It was a good, if brief, visit and it stands as the last time I got to see her alive.

I had hoped to make it before she died, and last week made plans to come over yesterday, but Monday she was told there was nothing more that the doctors could do except make her comfortable and by mid afternoon she was dead. And so here I am back in Washington State, having left at the planned time, but, unfortunately, not before her death.

I am running up to the Reservation today to attend the first of several good-bye services. The services will last three days because there are many, many people who are, like me, travelling to say good bye to someone who will be deeply missed.

My children and I arrived in town last night, paid for the hotel room, unpacked and then (once email etc had been checked) we went out to pick up some groceries and a little fast food for my daughter. Remember now, this is the US.  We went to a Jack in the Box drive through and I ordered poutine. It was a bit of a comedy. The woman said “what?”  I said “poutine.” She said “what?” In the end I ordered chicken strips and drove up to the window to pay.  She came over to the window and asked “what did you ask for?” And so I had to explain what poutine is and the expression on her face said “what?”  ”Never heard of it,” she said. “Wrong country,” I said.

We laughed; it was a bit of a face-palm moment I fear.  A long drive, never enough sleep, grief, and the shock of it all –  I am hazy, not quite here. Yet I am alive, and so laughter remains. It is a wonderous thing being human.